I am saddened that so many girls and women falsely believe that to be successful and accomplish their dreams, they must have a large social media following. In our culture, we have made our number of social media followers a metric of self-worth and success.
This lie can lead us to strive for follows by creating social media content we think will get attention, rather than investing time into becoming great at our craft. I have so many thoughts about the downsides of social media, but today I want to talk about how social media is a distraction from true success.
My story is proof you can have extraordinary success without popularity or social media fame. I got a book deal with a top publishing house with a private account and only 1,500 social media followers without a blue verified check next to my name.
Here are five keys to becoming successful without social media fame:
1. Define Success for Yourself
If you don’t define success for yourself, other people or our culture will define it for you. If you define success by social media stardom, you’ll exhaust your life striving for human approval rather than doing things you are proud of and bring you joy. Ask yourself honestly, “What is a successful life to me?” For me, it’s not the number of books I sell or accolades I get, but it’s my faith, joy, peace, mental health, quality of relationships, wellness and a life I can’t wait to wake up to.
2. Do something that Makes You Excited to Wake Up Every Day
David Cuschieri said, “Love what you do and do what you love. Passion is the key that opens the door to joy and abundance.” Passion births joy, and excellence follows it. It’s hard to excel at something we’re not passionate about. What makes you want to get out of bed in the morning? What do you enjoy doing that makes you lose track of time?
3. Spend Your Days Becoming Elite at Your Craft
In his book “Outliers,” Malcolm Gladwell presents the 10,000-hour rule. The 10,000-hour rule is a popular concept that suggests that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become an expert in a field. What do you want to be an expert at? Is it a sport, writing, singing, poetry, or entrepreneurship? 10,000 hours comes out to just 20 hours a week for 10 years. Imagine how great you could be at something if you traded 20 hours a week on social media for 20 hours of practice at whatever it is you want to become elite at.
4. Keep Your Head Down and Stay in Your Lane
Social media is a playground for comparison. We can become defeated when we see someone else having the success we dream of. We might think we can’t start that business because it’s already been created or we can’t write that book because it’s already been written. Focus on your own work, give it all you got and don’t pay attention to what everyone else is doing.
5. Build Relationships Instead of Social Media Followers
While it is true that having a large social media following often generates attention and brings open doors especially for influencers, it never guarantees success. I have found that my greatest opportunities have come through personal relationships I have cultivated offline. Take a genuine interest in people who do what you want to become great at. Go to networking events. Invite someone you admire to lunch. Interview them on your blog or podcast. Surround yourself with people who inspire you and selflessly invest in these relationships. When you work hard, are likable and have character, people will open amazing doors for you. They will want to support you and give you opportunties no number of social media followers will ever be able to.
What do you want to become great at? What does success look like to you? Follow your passions, invest time to become great, keep your head down, and surround yourself with people who inspire you and will support you in your dreams. When you do great work, success will naturally come.
This is your reminder that true success happens offline. Don’t conform to the social media circus and fall for the lie that you’ll never be successful without social media fame.
